Jacob
Nissen
Mr.
Schwager
English
405
28
February 2013
CWP Quarter 3: Satire
Our fair high school holds a place
in history for its being the first high school (to my knowledge) to attempt
integration. It is ground zero for the cooperation of man and machine in the
interest of bettering the educational experience. A noble goal by any
standards, but three years in, you have no doubt recognized as I have by this
time the problems that are so incessantly present in this trailblazing
venture.
For the sake of clarity I will
endeavor to list them out for you here, so that you may better understand where
I am coming from. The first major criticism iPads have received is that rather
than being the useful classroom apparatuses they are intended to be, they serve
to distract students from the subject matter and disrupt the class. Any teacher
will tell you how often this phenomenon occurs; in most cases, it is a daily
struggle to keep students focused and on task. In some classes, it is such a
big problem that the teacher must collect iPads in a basket at the start of the
period. In others, teachers neglect their incorporation altogether in order to
secure the attention of their pupils. I have observed for myself countless
times that questions posed to another student concerning the book or PDF the
class is examining is met with confusion and guilt as several audible clicks
are made in the journey from Facebook to the page he/she ought to be on. The
teachers here are by no means at fault. It is difficult enough to impart
knowledge to a mass of sophomoric teenagers, and the added responsibility of
keeping them off social media sites is an undue burden upon the good teachers
of this establishment. And as it is difficult to absorb both the latest gossip
and even the most rudimentary understanding of Shakespeare, the commingling of
humanity and technology has clearly failed to bring back the expected returns.
Another point often raised is the
inconvenience of having to tote the iPad around. It is no secret that the iPad
is rather cumbersome, and transporting the behemoth is taxing on even the most resilient
of backs. The unfortunate proportions of the thing make it such that it is too
large for a pocket yet too small for a standard cart. The iPad is thus a stranger
in both camps and cries of the burden this creates never cease.
Also cited is the unbearable
sluggishness the iPads possess. The bulk of this actually does not find the
iPad at fault. The Wi-Fi routers are bogged down by the constant frequenting of
social media sites by a large portion of the student body. The iPad itself is
mired by the download of useless gaming apps and the populace’s general negligence
when it comes to closing programs not in use. It is true that part of the problem
stems from the iPad’s inherent limitations, the likes of which are held by any
computational device, but each new model serves to transgress beyond these
boundaries. Thus the solution is simply to buy each new version of the iPad as
it comes out each year.
There is also a lot of outrage and
resentment surrounding the fact that very few of the text books are available on
the iPad. Now this is somewhat justified considering there is an entire
commercial that suggests Monte Vista students don’t need to have books because
of iPads (we can get into the moral problems of false advertising some other
time), but this isn’t the iPad’s fault. If the administration sets the bar
higher than the device can ever reach, it is much more to blame for the
universal disappointment than the iPads who at least presented their
limitations very clearly from the get-go. Nevertheless, the fact remains that
the books are not on the iPad, and that has made a lot of people very angry.
Another criticism concerns how the
iPads are often mistreated. The students seem to possess a certain propensity
for losing them. We have an entire building on campus that was very wisely cleared
out of all its books so that there might be more room to store the mountains of
backup iPads that need to be loaned to every student who rudely abandons
his/hers at home or misplaces it altogether. And we need a whole IT team to put
all the poor broken devices to rest and then send a replacement to wait the
slaughter. The money this wasteful practice requires keeps adding up, but the
maliciousness of students towards their mechanical compatriots shows no sign of
decreasing. Obviously there is a big problem here.
The last issue you’ll hear about
from me deals with the lack of knowledge concerning the iPad’s use. Most
students are inexperienced when it comes to this wonderful technology, and they
don’t know how to elicit the optimum performance from it. I think a large part
of why they turn so often to social media sites and games is that these are
simple and intuitive. Now this is not to say that the iPad is illogical in its
setup and its very essence is not user-friendly but rather that students
require tutorials either taken out of the teacher’s class time or offered
optionally over a holiday. The students have proven themselves quite unwilling
to utilize these generous offers; as a result, they dwell in their ignorance
and disgrace the technology by not using it to the design for which it was integrated.
From these unfortunate truths, I
hope you can surmise what I myself have been forced to come to terms with: the
noble experiment has failed. The fusion of man and machine in an educational
setting has created a slew of problems and has not to this point accomplished
its goal of a better scholastic experience. But do not be disheartened, for I
have found a solution. The obvious fact in all this is that students and iPads
were not meant to mix within the classroom, and it is with this in mind that I
propose putting an end to the integration process. The source of the problems involving
iPads in the classroom is clearly the human component, and as such, its
immediate removal will eliminate all the aforementioned evils.
Without the students, social media
sites are no longer there to serve as distractions from the subject matter.
Teachers will no longer have to worry whether iPads are being used properly. No
baskets would be necessary. The right PDFs and books will always be open, since
there are no uninterested students to stray from the path. The obsession with the
latest school drama will no longer block the flow of Shakespeare’s full
unadulterated awesomeness, so the entire learning experience will finally be
enhanced as intended by the introduction of iPads.
Additionally, there will be no more
complaints about transporting the iPads with the students voicing them gone. Travel
between school and home and travel between classrooms will no longer be
necessary, so the iPads can just stay in one place. This will make the whole
process of education more efficient because time no longer needs to be wasted
waiting for students to bring the iPad to class.
The issue of sluggishness disappears
as well. The various social media sites will no longer be visited, so the Wi-Fi
routers can run with an unseen quickness. Useless games won’t occupy memory
space, and no students will be there to carelessly leave programs running; as a
result, the iPads will also run at bewildering speeds. And with all the money
saved no longer having to provide for students various material needs, it is
easy to buy the frequent iPad updates to keep speed increasing.
With the iPads no longer having to
go home with the students, the problem of the text books not being on them goes
away. The iPads stay in the classrooms, where there are copies of all the text
books available. Because of this, no money has to be wasted on buying text
books for students’ homes, which once again opens up more money for use in
buying iPads.
Doing away with students
simultaneously does away with the mistreatment of iPads. Not leaving the
classroom, the possibility of them getting lost or abandoned somewhere is gone.
With no ill-willed students to break iPads, the school no longer has to fret. These
changes mean that less backup and replacement iPads need to be purchased, so
the books can return to the iPad building if the administration so chooses. The
school can save even more money because the IT team can be thinned out, as the
need their job addresses decreases dramatically. With all this extra money in
the school treasury, more iPads can be bought and the new models can replace
the obsolete versions each year.
When the students are finally taken
out of the classroom, the issue of having to educate them on proper iPad use
vanishes. The iPads will be free to work their full potential when the fetter
of humanity is thrown off. Class time and holidays will no longer have to be
wasted with technology tutorials, and the whole of the educational experience
will increase as it was meant to with the iPad.
As this has hopefully made blatantly
obvious, there is no way that iPads and students will better the educational experience
as long as they are present together. If the administration remains as devoted
to giving the iPads a place in the classroom as it currently is, the only method
to free them of the problems I have endeavored to list and elicit the most from
them is to eliminate the human component altogether. Only then will the superior
educational experience that was originally expected be created. It is my wish
that the administration will look on this expansive catalogue of problems and judge
the best course of action, which as I have said before is clearly the immediate
end of this futile attempt at integration.
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